OK – here’s the deal… I built this Bison II thing for the Under the Sun group build. It was not easy. This post is sort of a rambling essay on my experience…. I warn you, this is not for the faint of heart. I promise that I will not cuss – but that’s about it. The perpetrator in question is the Bison II model by Alan.

Round 1:

It started out innocently enough… I am sort of anal, so I always follow the instructions when I build a tank. This means that I started with the lower hull and running gear. That seems simple enough. The lower hull went together fine (it comes in three pieces), and the fit seemed good… more on this later. The next thing I did was fill in all of the sink marks on the front of the roadwheel arms…. each one had a nice prominent dimple. After that I managed to stick these to the hull so that they all rested on the tabletop when I set the hull down…. EXCELLENT – no floating roadwheels (a personal pet peeve of mine) I was soooooooo proud . I then put on the sprockets and idlers. By the way – the kit comes with two different styles of idlers and the instructions illustrate one style while calling out the part number for the other style. I suppose they wanted me to guess (turns out I guessed wrong – the idlers that I mounted are the wrong type). Oh well……

Next came the roadwheels. Guess what – I had several floaters that didn’t touch the tabletop after installation on the perfectly aligned roadwheel arms… Hmmmmmmm. Interesting. Upon closer inspection, it turns out that the roadwheels are not the same diameter. Each wheel is slightly a different size. Much filing and sanding ensued to get them all the same diameter as well as round. Well, I still had a few floaters…. Why? You ask…. The blasted holes in the back of the wheels are not centered! They molded these suckers with the mounting holes off center on the back! Much cursing…… On a side note… I just KNOW that the real thing didn’t have off centered roadwheels, right? The crew would get seasick driving their “clown” tank around…….. wouldn’t they? Round 1 goes to the Bison – he is cunning and wily.

Round 2:

After letting the Bison get the best of me in Round 1 – I was prepared to do battle now. I would double check EVERYTHING – take NOTHING for granted. I decided to snip a few track links off the sprues and test fit them on the sprockets… just to be sure (the kit does come with individual track links – a plus… or so I thought). They fit like a charm. Problem was that the bleeping roadwheels didn’t fit between the bleeping guide horns on the track. I don’t mean by a hair, either. The wheels were a good 1.5mm too thick. Much cursing…… After all of the work I had already done to get these stupid wheels level and true, I wasn’t about to rip ‘em off and file some more…. I played my trump card. I broke out a reserve set of Friuls that I had been saving for my Wespe… Take THAT you silly Bison… These tracks fit the roadwheels splendidly However, the Alan sprockets have about twice as many teeth as they should, so the tracks didn’t fit the sprockets now. Much cursing……. My poor Wespe then had to donate its sprockets to the cause… poor guy. Round 2 goes to the Bison – he seems to be gaining momentum.

Rounds 3, 4, 5:

This is where I really made up some ground. Now that I had the suspension and tracks problem solved – I could get down to business. This is the part I really like. The Eduard etch set was used, brass wire, lead foil, etch bits from an old Aber set, etc. Assembling and detailing the upper hull and superstructure was actually enjoyable, despite managing to super glue a hinge to my face….I’m sure most of you have done THAT before – so I don’t feel bad. I didn’t even have to curse when the hull top and bottom had about a 3mm gap in front. A little putty – and viola – good as new. I took rounds 3, 4, and 5. Little did I know that the Bison was only playing possum… lying in wait for an opportune moment to strike…

Round 6:

This is where the instructions call for the assembly of the main cannon and associated support framing. No big deal – I usually (in fact always) build the gun assembly separate from the main hull and stuff. This way I can detail and weather the part as subassemblies.

The Bison opened Round 6 with a swift kick to the groin…. It turns out that after you assemble the gun, it won’t fit into the fighting compartment. Kinda like building an entertainment center on your front lawn, then trying to get the blasted thing through your front door…. It ain’t happenin’. The worst part about all of this is the fact that you can’t properly align the gun sights ect., without dryfitting the gun assembly into the fighting compartment, but it is impossible to get the thing in there once you assemble the main gun frame. Much cursing…. Out came the nippers and I “disassembled” the gun and re-assembled it in the fighting compartment. I added the gun sights and got them properly lined up…. Oh great googly moogly….. now I can’t access the gun to assemble all of the support braces on the gunshield. I actually had to CUT the gun apart again…. Take it out of the fighting compartment…. Assemble everything BUT the support braces THEN put it back into the tank and fit the shield support braces…. GOOD GRIEF…. This thing is UNBUILDABLE….. Much cursing….. Now that I FINALLY have the support braces properly aligned and the gun shield in place… guess what… The aperture in the gun shield that is supposed to line up with the gun sight is about a full cm off. Nothing I can do about it now… without taking the gun apart AGAIN and re-working the shield (cut a new aperture and fill the old one). The good folks at Alan must get a laugh out of this… funny, VERY funny….. The crafty Bison takes Round 6 with a sucker-punch and a blow to the crotch…

Anyway – that’s where things stand now… The Bison and I are locked in a struggle to the death, and the score is tied 3-3… Now that the construction (re-construction) phase is complete, I am confident that I will come out the victor. Especially now that I have my pal Iwata on my side… that Bison won’t know what hit him.

I took a few mug shots of Mr. Bison tonight…evidence that this kit CAN actually be put together. I am assuming that this is something the designers at Alan never did. I will post these tomorrow – so you guys can get a look at this sucker. I plan on documenting the entire finishing process – just to show you all how it all turns out. If you are still reading this – I apologize for this rambling diatribe… I just needed to get this off my chest. I feel better

Later-
Jeff

Howdy Jeff,

For what it's worth I think we all have such stories tucked into our subconcious memory......our minds put such experience's there, as opposed to our concious memory, so we don't go completely insane!!
It does sound like you've stuck with it and 'brassed' it out with flying colours. My hat's off to you!

Good luck with the rest of your 'quest'.

Tread out.

..................." great googly moogly"......................gotta love that.

Thanks Tread....

I take it that you are familiar with Alan kits? In a wierd sort of way - I am very satisfied with my build... half a tube of putty and all. Maybe we remember overcoming the challenges moreso than we remember the kits that breeze together. I STILL think that driftwood would have been easier

Later-
Jeff

Jeff,

First, let me say how sorry i am for all the trials and tribulations this kit has caused to your daily routine. Hang in there, bud.

Second...(and this, I think, is the key to your problems w/said kit), it's a russian made kit...need i say more?

Kevin

All I can say is that we were here for you to get that off you chest. I keep saying that I will only build Tamiya kits but some of those 'other' ones are soooo interesting. I give you credit though, the last Alan kit I tried went into the trash 3/4 of the way done! Enough, is enough!!!.
capnjock

I put me money on the Bison II.

......bite your tongue TOKE!!! I think Jeff's already proved to us all that he's got the 'boys' for the job!! #:-) #:-)

I'm not generally a gambling man (too old, and have too many mouth's to feed for that), but if I were............my sheckle's would be on our man JEFF!

Show us all how it's done Jeff.....

Tread.

Oh, BTW, if any money change's hands on this deal, I want MY share!

I trust no roadwheel.I look at the back first.Especially on Russian kits.The cure is,to rotate each wheel on its axle,until it touches the ground.Can you say (USAY?) dry fit? I hope you post a lot of pictures,ansd if Alan dares to have an E mail adress,you should send them an email with your pictures and "fight " description.

I dread the fact that I have this kit snarling in my closet...

I feel your pain. I guess there are two kinds of modelers out there, those who model for fun, and those who model for the challenge. I'm the first kind, you are certainly the second kind. I admire you your stamina but I could never do it. I started building a DML Valentine and got to the third step and it wasn't working. It immediately went back in the box for later. I can't imagine going through what you went through. You have my respect though.

Now I might be wrong on my way of thinking but wouldn't the off center roadwheels be to your advantage to be able to rotate them around so there wouldn't be a floater, that is it possible for them to have done that intentionlly incase of warpage, without seeing the actual piece I really have no idea, but this thought has come to mind. Kinda like the twist out feet on a table so it doesn't have a floater. Just a thought.

Sorry Jeff, but you had me ROTFLMAO :-) :-) :-) Kinda sounds like my trials with the T-60 kit! It was by some Russian company - a subsidiary of the KGB, I believe.

Tankcarl - Just think what his tale would read like if it is translated into Russian by the same guys that translated the kit instructions into English #:-)

Good luck in the last three rounds

Jeff

Hey guys. The Alan Bison kit comes with a really nifty tea kettle. Without a doubt, the best part of the kit!

Hey Jeff, Sounds like you are putting up a good fight. Keep calm and for Gods sake..dont bite off the exhaust!!!....I take it you wont recommend this kit? #:-)